No More Dropping Shoes!!!

My grandmother used to tell me that things always come in threes.  Usually, she was referring to, well, unpleasant things.  If something unpleasant happened, and then another, she’d warn me to wait for the third. I spent too many hours of my childhood waiting for that third thing to happen, was never disappointed (it always arrived), and missed a lot of good stuff in between!

Years later, I was reading some bit of fiction where the character was waiting for the third shoe to drop.  No, it was not a three-legged (or footed) character, and I didn’t question that imagery since the notion of unpleasant things happening in threes was already woven into the fabric of my perception. It seems that the dropping shoe analogy is fairly modern in origin. Anyway, I continued to invest a portion of my time, my life, my essence in waiting for the third shoe to drop.

So much of the baggage I’ve dragged around with me through life was not even mine to carry.

I cleaned my plate because my grandmother had lived through famine and didn’t want any more children to experience that. She filled my plate to sate the hunger she felt…but I was expected to eat it.

In high school, I was not allowed to join the ski club because my mother was afraid I’d have an accident. Mind you, high school was in Ohio…not exactly known for its ski resorts!

It took me a very long time to understand I was buried under my elders’ fears, judgments, and prejudices. It took me a very long time to find my way to my Self on the road to hell that others’ good intentions had paved for me. It took me a very long time to figure out I had to get off that road and ditch the excess baggage.

14 thoughts on “No More Dropping Shoes!!!

  1. Lol – I used that analogy just the other day myself — shoes dropping. What you talk about here resonated with me and is something I’ve had to work hard on. Ironically, as my blog will talk about today, I think the Universe likes to “reset me” when I get too happy….a shoe drops like today 1/2 inch of water in our garage because our water heater blew. Yesterday I was very happy and then….water in the garage. Is there a hidden scale? Wonder.

    1. lol! I think there IS a hidden scale, Jackie. I was taught to expect the third shoe to drop only for unfavorable things. Why not for good things, too? The insidiousness of such a belief is that even when we’re focusing so much on positivity, as I know both of us are, there are these torpedoes we’ve forgotten about lurking in the depths of our consciousness (not to be mistaken with Consciousness!). Saying I’m dropping that excess baggage, and actually succeeding at it…well…I’m working on it! ;D xoxoM

      1. That really conjured a mental image for me Margarita – the hidden torpedos. Yes, I agree. Sometimes we get too complacent and “comfortable” and it’s time to grow a bit more….here comes the hidden spirit torpedo!!

  2. It’s amazing how long it takes for some of us to get “there.” Oh well. This was a nice thing for you to share. Thank you for talking about your experience. Oh, and by the way, I have those red sandals your dear cat is nuzzling, lol!

  3. Thank you for sharing this, Margarita. It’s nice to get to know you and your life a little better.

    I can relate so very much. I was told a lot of things about myself when I was growing up. I was told by my mom that I was selfish and made “mountains out of mohills.” I believed her.

    As an adult, after I moved 1,200 miles away, it gave me space from those accusations. Due to the distance between us, I started to see myself differently than what I was told. I discovered that the traits I was told to have were being projected onto me by those who couldn’t face them in themselves. It took me some time to find the true me. Even today, sometimes those old accusations creep back in, and I go to those dark places about myself. But, I have the tools and strength now to chase them away.

    Hope you don’t mind my sharing, too. Have a blessed weekend.

    1. Thanks for sharing, Lori!
      I think many of us can relate. It takes a very long time to realize and understand that much of what we’re carrying around with us really doesn’t belong to us.

      Sometimes it takes someone else’s story for the light bulb to go off in our own lives, and I hope you, with your comment, and I have offered that service to whoever needs it.

      Distance can be measured in both time and space. I’m glad 1,200 miles worked for you. I needed both! ;D xoxoM

      1. Oh yes, M, it took both time and distance. Now, after all these years, I’m back where I started (move back), and I can function from the real me without carrying around other people’s baggage.

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